closing down.

regrets

sometimes i really wish i can turn back the clock,

make things right again.

no one knows how intense the pain is,

because no matter what happens,

i keep smiling, pretending i am alright.

but i am tired,

to keep up with this facade,

to ignore the sadness within.

my foolishness has lead me to lose precious bonds.

bonds i know i will never be able to retrieve back again.

if only i can make things right again,

i really miss having you in my life.

every time something happen,

i type the msg out and scrolled to look for your name,

and then i paused and delete the msg.

because i know,

we are not the same anymore.

sorry, really sorry.

some things are just not meant to be.

I WANT TO GET MARRIED.

and of all a sudden,

i want to get married and have children.

:)






imagine me in a drop dead gorgeous white sexyback dress at the altar,

folding onto a bouquet of flowers,

without a groom.

SADDENING, hw to get married without a groom.

okay, this is why i want to have children.




awesome-ness cutest girls.

pictures does no justice.

if i can, i dont mind giving birth to 3 BUT,

i need a boyfriend first.

gdnight, i have work at 8.30am. WOOOS.

exam blues

i am quite screwed.

mind is blank except for...

subnet mask, tcp/ip, osi layer, layers in the osi, lan, wan, man, hubs, server, bridge, peer to peer, open system, information frame, supervisory frame, bit stuffing.

visuals

exam on thursday and friday!!

and omggg, only started on a few chapters.

where are my holidaysss...!!!!

21 days, just vanished like this.

*POOOF*

lazy to type, so feast your eyes on visuals. (:

disappointed like fuck.

put yourself into my shoes,

see it from my point.

honestly, you are the last person i expected to hear those shitcrap from.

you were the one who encouraged me,

yes, i didnt paid any heed to your advices.

but still, you dont have to run me down until like this.

what you expected me to do?

i am only human, and a very emotional girl at that.

i admit i made mistakes but do you think,

i am any happier now?

do you seriously think i am not feeling any tinge of sadness?

if you think so, fuck you.

you were my bestfriend, are you still now, ask urself that.

are all these my faults, are they?

fucking ask yourself.

after everything that was said and done,

i truely am disappointed.

thanks , the ex-bestfriend.

to you, you know who you are.

you were not who i thought you were,

i asked you a few times with that glimpse of hope,

it was foolish of me to even hope that for a split second,

you will throw away your god damn pride.

love is mutual yes i agree, but your definition of loving someone is warp.

how can you love someone so superficially?

was there nothing good about me?

was i that a horrid person that you cant even list out anything you like about me?

so if some other girls runs along and tell you, she is fond of you.

you too in turn like her too, is that your idea of love?

if thats the case, your love is so fragile,

builds easily and falls as easily too.

i thought after all these while, perhaps you have known a bit my character.

words and actions will affect me,

i will ponder and one thought leads to another.

infact your words pierced right through me, thoroughly.

if you think you were that an unimportant person in my life,

think again.

anyway thanks for making me fall even harder once again.